Pet Project

I'm going to prove that I'm right.

But when I do I'll want better.

Sometimes I wish that there was someone around that I could just fall in love with.

But we all know that love takes time and effort.

It takes opening yourself up to someone.

Sigh I wish I could just fall into it.

Someone find me and loooove meeee.

Is it something that will really never happen?

Sometimes I wonder if I'm just going to be alone.

LOOOVE MEE

Sigh, I feel so lonely. and i have no idea why.

i give up i completely give up.

i don't give a shit if im single for the rest of my fucking life.

im tired of being wrong and im tired of getting hurt.

F*** everything. peace.

One,Two,Three.

I've taken this blog off facebook so minus those that have saved this, most people probably aren't reading this anymore.

I'll take this liberty to sound angsty.

I believe in the idea that if something means a lot to you, you keep trying until you finally get it.

But I don't believe in this idea when it comes to love. I guess I've been jaded by my past experiences, but I won't give someone more than one try. If it doesn't work the first time, I'm not going to give it another try.

Why would you keep giving someone the time of day that won't even give you the time of day? Why put yourself in a situation where the person doesn't even really give half a shit about you, and keep trying? It doesn't make sense the only thing that happens in the end is that you get hurt.

I guess I say this because I've had it happen to me and I've been jaded because it was such hell to go through. Your optimism doesn't get you anywhere.

In the end you're left to pick up the pieces after you've been completely desolated.

I hate seeing others do this to themselves, I hate seeing it in general cause it reminds me of what I had to go through.

Nobody is worth that kind of time, and nobody is worth that kind of pain.

There are ALWAYS other fish in the sea.

And they are always better.

Fear

The only thing that is holding me back,

is my own fear of the unknown.

Perhaps I am too comfortable,

living in a world dictated only by my actions.

Sometimes, I really wonder...

but eh.

it only stops where you stop

Too passive, I need it to be more aggressive.

Keep Going

Do it harder,
make it more intense,
push yourself to the limit,
gotta get better.

Gotta work harder.

I will get there.

Obesity

For the first time in a LONG time, I felt incredibly....out of shape. I would call it obese. Most unpleasant feeling ever.

At one point during practice, I told myself that I would throw away EVERY SINGLE PIECE OF JUNK FOOD, that I own, and eat nothing but healthy food. Fruits, Veggies, lean meats, seafood. NOTHING BUT HEALTHY FOOD. I also promised myself to never stop exercising ever again. I think that I won't keep that promise, but my god getting tired during suburi and footwork? Sad...so sad...

Practice was interesting, and I made a new friend :).

Yey! Kendo improvement! I love Kendo improvement! The more people different kinds of people and styles I can practice before nationals, the better. It means my kendo grows even more. Yey!

I definitely appreciate that i live in socal just because it gives me a little bit of different perspective on kendo, or more people's kendo styles than just nckf.

Too bad blood blister :( why? pain!

IT'S OKAY HEAL LITTLE ONE HEAL!

P.S. Never cutting excessive amounts of skin off my foot again. NEVER. always blisters ALWAYS.