YEY NON EMO POST.

My life is kind of sucking right now. BUT I got my endorphins so I'm all happy now :D. I'm chipper and cheery like I normally am. WOOHOO. I guess this is what happens when you sit on your ass for like a month and a half after doing a shit load of exercise for like...a year and a half..

ANYWAY, this weekend is going to awesome-tastic.

So let's draw out my weekend in pictures!Woohoo!



Sexay hair with blurred out face. Yes, I think my face is going to be blurred out too.




Yey boat paddling!


This picture speaks for itself.

AND finally...



HELLO BABY! BBQ

That is all :D

I think I've finally just gotten tired and stopped really giving a fuck.

Wow, it feels kind of good.

Why am I trying so hard to make this work?

I really enjoy eating cheese with bread and honey. Alone each of them don't taste that great but together, it's amazing.

Wait, let me bitch and moan a little more.

Looking for housing in Berkeley, fucking sucks.

I guess it'd be slightly entertaining to tell the story of my housing adventures.


So today, Ani and I went to go see a very small studio and a room share which is basically me renting a room in a house. Of course the studio is up teh butt crowded by students trying to find a friggen place to live, and thus has a freakin waiting list of applicants. So I leave my info and go off to see this room in some house that's in a relatively decent location.

So, this guy opens the door. Mind that Ani and are talking and about to ring the doorbell and this guy opens the door before I can even ring the doorbell. I can be loud but I definitely wasn't there. Then, this creepy looking guy is standing there waiting for us to come in. This guy is probably in his 50s I would think. The man's presence is something like the presence that Severus Snape from Harry Potter commands, creepy, angry and not tolerating of anything that doesn't follow his standards. He goes on and tells me more logistics about the apartment all while making Ani and I feel as though we shouldn't be there. I have nothing to say because I'm SCARED of this man, so I just say that I'll think about it and send him an email.

But honestly, the only thing that I really wanted to do was get the hell out of there! How the hell could anyone live with him without feeling as they shouldn't exist or in fear? O.O.....I have no idea.

At that point I discover Ani is also afraid of that man, and that I am now traumatized and will not live in a house with people over 30. Also, I am now more than willing to live in a studio..and pay the extra cash over a room share...

>.<

Moral of the story? Looking for housing in Berkeley fucking sucks.

Yet another post about how much coding sucks. I have no idea how I'm going to accurately test this.


NO IDEA.....

I don't think I could ever be a computer science researcher, or maybe just in the field of EE. This shit sucks. It's boring.

SUCKS.

I can't wait til it's over.

We shall see. hom.

"This *is* me taking control; from Sloan, from the fraternity, from Janis, billing reports, ergonomic keyboards, from cheating girlfriends and sack of shit best friends. This is me taking back control of my life." -Wesley Gibson, Wanted

This is me taking back my life.

I'm tired of this prison. It's time to break out.

------------------------------

If you lie to me, I will always find out the truth. I'd rather you be honest and straightforward, than try to cover shit up or try to be nice about something.

Honesty goes a long way. Even if it hurts I will respect you for it. Covering shit up or lying will only piss me the fuck off.

I don't understand it at all, I don't think I will. I don't think I'm supposed to. This shouldn't be anything, it shouldn't mean anything.

But for the first time in my life, I don't want to give up.

I want it to be real.

I feel like this is worth trying for.

I will fight.

Maybe this is what I needed.

The hot flowing emotions from the gateway to my soul,
My frustration, love, anger, pain, happiness, life
This is everything and nothing,
My existence, the most real an emotion will ever be

Do you see these flowing tears,
These are the emotions, that I can't put into words
This pain is an intensity I can not begin to explain
This happiness I cannot express,
Can you taste the bitter taste of saddness, pain, and frustration?
Or the salty sweet of happiness and love?

These tears I hold back,
I hold back because they are the emotions I fear
They are the ones that break out of the prison I keep them in.
They are everything that I cannot let be.

They are the quiet burdens that I carry,
The secrets that I hold so dear,
The hopes and dreams that I dare not say,
They are the part of me that I am afraid to let be seen


Do you see them?
These parts of me I cannot hide anymore.

sink sink sink. burn.

ouch.

Actually that's just a reminder for me, but... this is a good song.

(12:49:56 PM) SEREN obsessed: so i'm really special
(12:49:59 PM) Me: ?
(12:50:02 PM) SEREN obsessed: and reading an effing article
(12:50:05 PM) SEREN obsessed: in wikihow
(12:50:12 PM) SEREN obsessed: entiteld "how to know if a guy likes you"
(12:50:16 PM) Me: lol
(12:50:20 PM) SEREN obsessed: THEY'RE MENTIONING RECESS AND FUCKING HOMEWORK
(12:50:26 PM) Me: lol
(12:50:26 PM) SEREN obsessed: THIS SHIT IS FOR MIDDLE/ HIGH SCHOOL
(12:50:29 PM) Me: LOL
(12:50:33 PM) SEREN obsessed: WHAT THE FUFUUCUCJCK
(12:50:36 PM) Me: can i quote you
(12:50:37 PM) Me: lol
(12:50:46 PM) SEREN obsessed: "if he invites you to his birthday party or any kind of party"
(12:50:47 PM) SEREN obsessed: what the shit.
(12:50:54 PM) Me: lol
(12:50:58 PM) SEREN obsessed: sure i guess
(12:51:01 PM) Me: then it means he wants people todrink with
(12:51:02 PM) Me: ahha
(12:51:32 PM) SEREN obsessed: wow: must be high school: If he talks to you and wants to know how you're doing,
(12:51:38 PM) Me: OMG
(12:51:40 PM) Me: LOL
(12:51:43 PM) Me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHA
(12:52:05 PM) SEREN obsessed: here'se even better
(12:52:05 PM) SEREN obsessed: If he asks you to dance with him at the dance. Note: He may be trying to be nice because he thinks you like him. But if you are at a middle school dance, he's probably too vain and self centered of a fraidy cat, so he probably
(12:52:35 PM) Mes: lol
(12:52:37 PM) Mes: ......
(12:52:43 PM) SEREN obsessed: ummyeah
(12:52:46 PM) SEREN obsessed: why am i still reading this

oh roommate you are hilarious. For reference here is the link to what she's talking about.

http://www.wikihow.com/Know-if-a-Guy-Likes-You

No update yet, I'm lazy.

Anyway, I think its time for me to make a sacrifice. A sacrifice for the greater good of my body.
I'm gonna eat VEGGIES, wait I was supposed to that before. I think that when I get some time I'm gonna work on creating a vegetarian dish a week...SURPRISE SUPRISE.it'd probably be something thats not that healthy knowing me...

Dundundundundundun.

In two weeks..when I get settled into a new place... finding housing in berkeley is the biggest bitch ever.


Cheese honey and bread are divine however I must say.

Oh yeah remember how I said I was going to give my brain a blueberry buffet? I totally bought a bunch of blueberries to eat.

Gar Gar Gar. I will post about my birthday later, but for now I'm going to complain.

GARG It's gyming time now I guess that I have free time.

It's amazing the difference free time makes in terms of taking care of yourself, and making sure that you're fit and not eating horribly being a blob and sleep deprived.

In other words, it makes you happy, and healthy.

Ninja Gaiden is crack.

Dun dun dun I'm 22!

I love my DS, it is the best thing since sliced bread. I love my ps3 and my ps2, but it's just not as portable as my DS. Plus...since there are people living in the living room I can't play it til hell breaks.


DS <3 <3


I bought myself two cakes. Why? Because...I really wanted a korean cake :p and... the other one is a hungarian cake.

I'M SUPER EXCITED. yomyom cake!

I'm also curious as to how today will pan out o.O. But I wouldn't mind just rolling around in bed :D and playing DS and getting out of bed and playing ps3. It would be glorious!

But I have to do laundry :(.

Some days the only thing you want to do is stay in your room and do nothing.

I've been feeling slightly anti-social as of late.

Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck.

I need to go to the gym, I need to go to the gym, I need to go to the gym. arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm feeling like a big huge blob that has not had enough physical activity. Dear GOD, I need to excercise.

Oy, this is what happens when you get deprived I guess.

I will NOT let anything fuck this up. I will NOT. I don't care what I have to do.

There's more behind this intricately planned play than what you think. But I don't think anyone will believe the truth.

I hate math, tonight I will eat a giant plate of spaghetti and hot links. Yes hotlinks, I'd much rather have beef, but I need to get rid of those friggen hotlinks.

I am doing math until my eyes bleed. On another note. Carnival games or the DS is kind of fun, it brings back childhood memories. Although I don't think those childhood memories are the kind any child should have..

GAR SAVE ME FROM THE PAIN OF SCHOOL.

Thursday and Friday seemed to balance each other out. Thursday was HORRIBLE. Friday was AWESOME.

Then woohoo Connie and Annie time! <3. Nothing like Jacuzzis and wine + delicious cake. Plus I think going to Connie's made my Chinese better.

Aww more friend time <3

I just realized how much I miss my friends.

:(

They are the most awesome people ever. Ahhhhhhh I <3 my friends.