不動心

It's 6 in the morning I've gotten like 30 minutes of sleep but there's a lot that I've finally realized. Hahaha, yes right before a midterm.

I'm not that weak person that I used to be anymore, that one thing that I've worked so hard to obtain, that strong spirit, the kiai, the fighting spirit that I've been looking for, I think that I finally realize that I have it. It took me about 2 and a half years of self cultivation to find this and it's not perfect, but it's there. I finally realize it now.

I do not doubt myself anymore.
I do not doubt my self worth.
I do not think that I am sub par to anyone.
Nor do I think that I superior.
I will not rise above, and I will not step down. It's all on even ground.
When all things come down to it, I and everyone else in this world are equals.
It doesn't matter if I have more experience, or less that is not something of importance.
When it comes down to it, it's about you at that moment, the connection you have with your opponent, and the dance that ensues.
Sometimes you lose sometimes you win.
That's not what's important in the end.
It's how you walk away with the result.

Command the mind and everything else will follow suit.

I finally learned to let go of a 5 year burden, and to forgive someone I have not be able to forgive for a while.

I feel free. I feel strong.

This is what I call my 不動心.