A Taste of Kendo

Sorry, this one is gonna be a boring, non entertaining post about one of my passions in life. It's also a fairly solemn post so be warned.

Although I've only been doing kendo for 2 years, I've definitely jumped around to a lot of different places just because of the nature of how things have gone on in my life.

I go to school in Berkeley, that is my home dojo, but I live in SoCal which means that during breaks I practice somewhere else.

I went abroad to Taiwan for a little bit this summer, so I've tasted a bit of their kendo as well.

I feel like there are just so many different styles of how practice can be run as well as styles of fighting.

Sometimes I wish I had done it for longer before being able to taste so many styles, because I feel that if I were much more experienced I would be able to gain more from tasting so many styles.

But as a result of throwing myself into these things so early, I have learned a lot as a developing player. I don't really get nervous playing people I've never played before because it happens so much. I don't aim to win when I play competitions, just to develop myself because I know most people I play are more experienced than I. This results in being a bit more relaxed than I would be if conditions were different. At the same time I haven't been able to really develop my own style because everything is kind of mushed together. I suppose being able to taste so much teaches me to figure out what it is I want out of this, and what kind of style I want to pursue.

One drawback is that feeling of home. Familiarity. That comfort of going somewhere and knowing exactly what is going to happen. I feel like when I go to my home dojo it is home, but there is enough break time to feel as though home gets lost sometimes.

I think that in life in general since I went to college, I feel as though the feeling of home has gotten lost.

I don't feel completely at home at home because I'm just a visitor. I don't feel completely at home in my apartment at school because again I'm just a visitor.

I think a part of me succumbs to the loneliness that results from being so unsure of where to call home.